Hey ladies, and yes I say ladies because this post is specifically for women looking to radiate confidence in all areas of their lives. Confidence is a word that we always hear. In grade school we learned about self-esteem and self-confidence, but how do we really build this confidence muscle? How do we continue or start to believe in ourselves and our abilities? When I think of successful, inspiring women I think of Beyonce’ and Oprah. (I know cliche); but they are both very smart and extremely confident in their crafts and talents. Of course, I’m sure they’ve faced some doubt, but despite that they’ve both continued to master their gifts. When self-doubt gets in the way, that’s what stops us from doing the things we really want to do. What’s the difference between the person who went for it, and the person who didn’t? I believe one simply may have been more driven and confident in their abilities.
Not only have Oprah and Beyonce’ perfected their craft, they’ve expanded their horizons to different areas. Is Beyonce’ the most amazing actress? No. (sorry Bey-hive), BUT she can say that she expanded her skill set, and I’m sure she’s learned from all her acting experiences. Oprah also has expanded into other realms such as, owning her own t.v. network, and executive producing the hit show “Queen Sugar”, which I love. Oprah has a lot of unique experiences under her belt, and she always continues to wow us with her talents. Ladies, I say this to say IT’S TIME TO GET IN FORMATION. Lol! It’s time that we are confident in taking on new opportunities, and believing we can do all that we put our minds to. It’s time that we start living to our full potential.
Confidence is something that I’ve always battled with. Even though it may not always seem like it…somehow I turned out to be a pretty outgoing adult that loves making new friends lol. But I was the EXACT opposite as an adolescent. Thankfully I’ve came out my shell, but I’m a continuous work in progress! (Read how moving to a new city has helped me to step out of my comfort zone: A Weekend in My New City!). As I continue to work out my confidence muscle I want to share 5 ways us ladies can exude confidence in 2018:
1. Voice your thoughts & opinions in the workplace/or just in general – So, if you follow me on Instagram you probably saw my post where I mentioned that I’m working on voicing my opinion in the workplace. Guys, this is really an area of improvement for me. I have to get it out of my head that I’m too “young”, or not senior enough to actually know what I’m talking about. My previous manager gave me great performance feedback, and she mentioned that I should be more confident in speaking what I know, so that people can actually trust/believe what I’m saying. I realize now that if I want to be in a leadership role one day I’m going to have to speak UP. This is what I’m doing in my new role, is letting management know of my new ideas, and not feeling intimidated by those who are older and more senior than me.
2. Step out of your comfort zone and try a new look – Ladies, a new hairdo can have you feeling like a new woman! Lol. I dare you to try a new hairstyle or purchase an outfit you wouldn’t typically wear. Life is too short to be scared to spice up your look. Try a new hair color or protective style. I tried goddess locs for the first time and I LOVEEDDDDD them. They made me feel so beautiful, and it felt good to show another side to me. There’s just something about braids, locs, etc., that makes me feel like I’m fully embracing my African roots. Try this out ladies, thank me later!
3. Don’t over analyze, overthink, or doubt yourself – Everyday I tell myself to not over analyze, be in the moment, and to be confident in who I am (meaning to not doubt myself and overthink the things that I’ve said or done). I’m learning to be content with my being. I’m not going to go back and try to change things, but will rather stumble, pick myself up, and keep it moving. When I used to make mistakes at work (at my old job, where I was extremely overworked) I would beat myself up about it, try to understand how I made the mistake, and I rarely forgave myself. Now, I’m comfortable recognizing mistakes, and moving on from them. For anything I may have did wrong, there’s many more things that I did right and I’m choosing to focus on that. I’m reading this book and it says it’s so easy for humans to focus on our mistakes, instead of our successes. Now at work I keep a mental note of all of the things that I’m doing well, so I don’t feel as bad when a mistake is made.
4. Put yourself out there – Sign up for a dating app, go to a meet-up group, engage with someone new in the workplace, text someone you haven’t talked to in a long time but you miss. Putting yourself out there is always hard. It’s natural to fear rejection, but you never know what can come out of a new interaction. You could meet your next bae, bff, business partner, or mentor just by taking a leap. After you do this you’ll feel so proud of yourself for not being fearful, and you’ll feel more confident with practicing this idea of “putting yourself out there”.
5. Workout to feel good and confident in your body – Okay guys I’m not even going to lie. I went to the gym last week for the first time in monthsssss, but I felt great afterwards. I’m planning to get back into the gym consistently like I was doing a couple years ago, and I also plan to join a yoga studio. I used to work out at least 3 times a week after work, and I felt amazing. This is a great way for us to feel our very best ladies; we have to get active!